Is it just me?
Perhaps it's just me, but I don't think it is. Ladies, seriously, is the quest for a good Christian man a myth - a fantasy? This guy seems to think so.
http://www.christianitytoday.com/singles/newsletter/mind50831.html
I'm pretty confused about the answer to that question. Now, I'm far from the "anti-dating" femi-nazi type. In fact, I would certainly take up most guys on an invitation to hang out. It sure beats sitting at home re-reading He's Just Not That Into You. The problem is that I haven't really met too many new people in the last six months or so. Just a thought - are there any normal guys out there? I have gone out of my comfort zone a few times to hang out with new people, even guys. But when I do, I discover that the dude is WEIRD. Not just kind of strange, or misunderstood, we're talking complete freaks here. I'll spare you the sordid details, but trust me, it's embarassing.
A majority of the young Christian women I know are absolutely amazing! You're all beautiful, intelligent, God-fearing, funny, down-to-earth females that I would wish for a nice Christian guy in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, I really can't think of many guys to set you up with. Most of my male friends are either married or are involved in a serious relationship.
Now, I don't consider myself to be super-picky. In retrospect I WAS somewhat unrealistic about dating when I was in high school and college. Not full on Jerry Seinfeld (remember when he dumped a woman because she ate peas one at a time?), but I passed up a few guys that I should have given a chance. Senior year, one nice guy expressed some interest in me, and I pretty much ignored it all. Too bad, because he's a great person. And although bold in life, I am rather shy with guys I'm actually interested in. Usually, they had no idea I liked them.
On the other hand, we shouldn't date a man just to have someone to hold our hand. Using a relationship as a crutch for holes in your own life doesn't help either of you, and that's totally wrong. For some of you, as hard as this will be to hear, we shouldn't be with someone that's obviously wrong for us. I'm not trying to get up on a soapbox here, but I personally, would not date a non-Christian. I read a good quote once, "If you don't want to marry a non-Christian - don't date one." So I've chosen to take that to heart. We've all seen couples that are so wrong for each other, and they don't realize it. Or maybe they do?
Anyways, it seems like a country-wide epidemic. Christian women have a difficult time meeting Christian men... that are single. Agree/disagree?
http://www.christianitytoday.com/singles/newsletter/mind50831.html
I'm pretty confused about the answer to that question. Now, I'm far from the "anti-dating" femi-nazi type. In fact, I would certainly take up most guys on an invitation to hang out. It sure beats sitting at home re-reading He's Just Not That Into You. The problem is that I haven't really met too many new people in the last six months or so. Just a thought - are there any normal guys out there? I have gone out of my comfort zone a few times to hang out with new people, even guys. But when I do, I discover that the dude is WEIRD. Not just kind of strange, or misunderstood, we're talking complete freaks here. I'll spare you the sordid details, but trust me, it's embarassing.
A majority of the young Christian women I know are absolutely amazing! You're all beautiful, intelligent, God-fearing, funny, down-to-earth females that I would wish for a nice Christian guy in a heartbeat. Unfortunately, I really can't think of many guys to set you up with. Most of my male friends are either married or are involved in a serious relationship.
Now, I don't consider myself to be super-picky. In retrospect I WAS somewhat unrealistic about dating when I was in high school and college. Not full on Jerry Seinfeld (remember when he dumped a woman because she ate peas one at a time?), but I passed up a few guys that I should have given a chance. Senior year, one nice guy expressed some interest in me, and I pretty much ignored it all. Too bad, because he's a great person. And although bold in life, I am rather shy with guys I'm actually interested in. Usually, they had no idea I liked them.
On the other hand, we shouldn't date a man just to have someone to hold our hand. Using a relationship as a crutch for holes in your own life doesn't help either of you, and that's totally wrong. For some of you, as hard as this will be to hear, we shouldn't be with someone that's obviously wrong for us. I'm not trying to get up on a soapbox here, but I personally, would not date a non-Christian. I read a good quote once, "If you don't want to marry a non-Christian - don't date one." So I've chosen to take that to heart. We've all seen couples that are so wrong for each other, and they don't realize it. Or maybe they do?
Anyways, it seems like a country-wide epidemic. Christian women have a difficult time meeting Christian men... that are single. Agree/disagree?
posted by Jennifer @ 8:24 PM
5 Comments:
At 9:39 AM, November 08, 2005,
Anonymous said…
why single Christian guys are weird
At 12:10 PM, November 08, 2005,
Marianne said…
hey, anonymous, thanks for the link. i flipped through the "wild at heart" book in B&N one day. i agree that most of church is depressingly feminine, but it is perceived that way for by adventurous girls, too. I hate those whiny, "me-centered" love songs to "my Jesus," that say nothing about the glory, power, and strength of the God that I read about in the Bible.
Kell, I'd love to hear your take on the article linked there, perhaps in reference to men and Three Nails? Maybe a new post???
At 4:52 PM, November 08, 2005,
Anonymous said…
Agreed! However, Christian men also have a difficult time meeting Christian women. Women, in all their logical senses, put up safe guards and sometimes do not allow men to get close. They say they would like to meet a nice guy but don't give the men a chance to prove that they are actually a nice guy. Unfortunately, 99.9% of the men in the world give the truly quality .1% of the population a bad name. Trust is not easily gained because too many women have been hurt before so they are forced to be more protective of their space. I totally understand the reasoning but at the same time, relationship cannot take off if risks are not taken. Being hurt stinks but risking that hurt is sometimes the only way to truly get to know someone. If you want to meet a "good Christian guy," please try to be a little more trusting. Believe it or not, not every man is deceiving you and being nice to you simply for the sake of getting you into bed. From a personal male standpoint, men like that need to be taken behind a barn and smacked around and then be forced to go to a class about how to treat women they way they deserve to be treated. They need to be treated as the beautiful creations that God created them as. Ladies, there is that man for you. Don't lose heart!
At 5:02 PM, November 08, 2005,
Marianne said…
i don't speak for my fellow ladies, but I can positively say that I don't have an issue trusting people with my acquaintance-time. In fact, I usually have to beat people off with sticks....well, except for "christian" men between the ages of 20-30. Yeah, they ignore me.
Everyone else, no problem. I enjoy the occassaional random blind date or coffee (COFFEE) with an almost-stranger.
Girls? Are you being closed off? And if not, if you're nothing but sunshine and smiles for all and sundry, what then?
At 3:19 AM, November 10, 2005,
Jennifer said…
I guess I'm one of those fun-loving "just one of the guys" types. (But I do like girly stuff like fashion and shopping, along with computers and newegg.com) Does that shave points off of my "date" potential? I really have no idea. I'll admit that I don't trust people right off the bat, but once you've won me over (which isn't too difficult) I'm pretty much yours. My friendships and other relationships are a top priority, and I'm extremely loyal.
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